The Case of the Patented PBJ
Filed away under Fucking
Great Ideas is the crimped PBJ,
where the PBJ chef thinly spreads
the peanut butter on both breads,
and then you put your Smuckers
in between and crimp the edges.
There's no soggy bread,
and all of that sweet smuck
stays where it belongs.
But the U.S. patent office
smucked everything up,
they said "everybody knows
about the coat and crimp method.
Moms and other interested parties
have been doing it for years."
They must think they are
pretty smucking smart.